he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
