So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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