You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
