i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
