And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
