After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
They are going to name an STD after you.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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