he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
