There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
