her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
