im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
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Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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