id be glad to
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
