I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
