Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Randomize
