he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
