Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize