Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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