how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
