hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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