I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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