You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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