a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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