OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
