Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
