Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
