So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
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