As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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