oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize