Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
