Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
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