And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I think a kid would responsible me up
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
