Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Tell her she can't have a vagina
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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