everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize