billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...