i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
