Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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