So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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