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• (773): View more from Illinois

  you want me

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  i'd rather choke on a dick.

  Fav 3 1351 1967

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.

  Fav 28 1537 10144

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• (206): View more from Washington

  I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.

  Fav 21 1300 6225

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.

  Fav 34 5538 1406

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• 

  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow

  Fav 10 1972 4533

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• (716): View more from New York

  her body is proportioned like a family guy character

  Fav 15 1836 4560

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• (530): View more from California

  We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer

  (1-586): View more from Michigan

  Ok let me change into clothes i can run in

  Fav 10 3163 949

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.

  Fav 4 1344 631

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• 

  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (574): View more from Indiana

  HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.

  Fav 2 899 519

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up

  Fav 6 1084 595

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.

  Fav 3 804 531

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• (912): View more from Georgia

  Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.

  Fav 5 773 924

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer

  Fav 3 1153 496

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