you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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