So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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