So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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