i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
