So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I'm at about main and main street
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
