do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks