i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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