She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
tonight lets celebrate not being married
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
