We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize