I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize