I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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