And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
