Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
