Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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